Imaginatorium

I have been listening to the revised version of Steven Curtis Chapman’s song “Yours” on repeat today. Every single time I heard it, I shed a tear or two… for this man, his family, the state of the world, the pain I feel inside… it reminded me that I need to live- Now. I have no promise of another day. I found out yesterday that I was accepted to work my first Compassion International event… I finally have the opportunity to help children find sponsors- just as I have had the joy of sponsoring my own children. My heart soars at the thought of helping the poor… regardless of my friend’s views on the topic. I am also blessed to be working a job where I can serve those who are broken… and to be celebrating a year with the organization on Oct 1. I can’t believe how incredibly blessed I am.

There was a bee in my room today. Its buzz startled me from a mid morning nap. I have never been stung, but am afraid to try it… I have too many allergies as it is.

Ms. Bee was frantically trying to get through the blinds. I don’t think she realized the window was closed. I wanted to help, but my fear kept me still… I didn’t want to scare her and risk my own life for one with a two week span.

From the sound of her buzz, she too was scared… she wanted out, but she couldn’t find a way. The light from the outside must have given her a blind hope. Once she got through the blinds, her buzz grew more alarmed. There was no escape! She was trapped between glass and plastic slates, knowing that her demise would be met soon.

I wanted so badly to set her free, to guide her to the outdoors… but my fear held me still. I wanted to convince her that I was safe and wanted the best for her, but there is no reasoning with a frightened bee. Her terrified buzz kept me away.

The buzzing has since stopped. I hope Ms. Bee somehow found her way through a vent or a door- into the familiar sights of nature. I hope she is free to carry out her life purpose until old age brings it to an end. I hope she is back with her sisters… I am afraid to open my blinds and discover her there. I felt quite empathetic towards that little bee.

My mind has found a new playground. Somehow I missed the memo about Itunes U- a free section where almost any course of thought can be found in podcast form (including music lessons, mathematic lectures, marketing classes! This is amazing!!)

I am currently listening to a podcast entitled “What Makes a Terrorist.” Why, might you ask? Because earlier I read a Time magazine article about Iraqi suicide bombers… and honestly, it shook me to the core.

The podcast is discussing how Poverty and a lack of Education are not necessarily the direct causes of terrorism. I agree. The Time article interviewed a young Iraqi who was a bomber in training. He was from a semi-wealthy family and was very well educated. He had chosen to pursue training because he wanted to kill as many infidels as possible, for the glory of Alla. He had his reasons, his convictions, and he knew his stuff… he felt called to kill Americans.

Not all Muslim people feel this way. Not all Iraqi’s or Pakistani’s believe that Alla wants Americans dead. Those who do believe these things feel that they are honoring their god and their country- protecting their country from Western influence and guaranteeing themselves a place in heaven.

I think this is why Jesus’ words are so real to me… they are so unlike man’s ideas. Instead of saying “Kill your enemies” He says “love”. Instead of saying “you need to do something for me to guarantee a spot in Heaven” He says “I bought your place in eternity… trust in Me.” What man would say such a thing when killing and wiping out towns is a much easier way to get things accomplished? I know the old testiment has a lot of examples of God calling for the destruction of Israel’s enemies… and of war… and of killing those who dishonor Him… but Christ’s blood put an end to that!

I suppose if you don’t have Christ, you don’t have a reason to follow His teachings… in many ways, there are terrorists here in America, in Europe, in China- people who follow a different set of rules.

This war is real… this battle for the hearts the minds of people… it is so difficult to define.

“The promise you made is ready to be fullfilled, for we’re broken and bleeding and needing a savior…”
-Rick Hopkins, Lift up Your eyes

I did something out of the ordinary today. Instead of doing as I always do, carefully weighing to pro’s and con’s of every major purchase and almost always ending up without, I shut my brain off. My boss’ wife bought a new Mac and it came with a free printer and a free ipod touch. When he offered me the touch (at a reduced price) I jumped on it… even though I already have a newer iPod. This event goes against all logic, all rational… Yes, I was thinking about a new PDA, but maybe when the old one died- maybe after I had my finances totally in order. I bought something on impulse… something quality… this is so not like me.

I suppose it’s all alright as I am working a lot more this week. While I won’t be getting overtime, I will be able to comp a day… so I can save it for my vacation time next year (and not worry so much about losing half a paycheck!) I decided to put my new little friend to use… to remind myself what I could be doing with my Saturday- and what I have to do.

My dream Saturday

My Actual Day

As sad as it is to know that my creative energy must be saved for another day, I am thankful for the job and for the hours. By getting out of work around 9 this evening, I actually got to see the sunset! (for the first time in… a while!) I haven’t seen some of those colors in a sunset before… the splendor of God’s creation never ceases to amaze me!

Beautiful colors

It's like a rainbow

Blues and Oranges... don't see that color combo much

Even though things feel a bit crazy right now, I know this season will pass fairly quickly. I am excited for the kids who have yet to see their new high school… and I am excited to be a part of such a neat organization- even if I lose my 3 day weekend

I ran the stairs today at work. Up and down… floor to floor. I managed to get a few computers moved along the way. It was quite an exhausting day.

Afterwards, I met up with my friend Diana for coffee and a walk. The walk ended up lasting almost two hours as we walked about 7 miles around Lake Eastbrook (according to google maps, anyway.) D is trying to get me to train for a triatholan, so I suppose this is a good place to start

God is teaching me a lot about taking things one step at a time. Be it stairs, walking, or getting things done at work… I can’t do it all at once. As much as I want to be at point Z, I’ve gotta start with points A, B, and C. There’s a logical order to things for a reason, and the timing needs to be trusted to Him.

For instance, our high school needs to be ready for students by Tuesday. Before teachers can start moving in, we need to get occupancy permits. Before we can get the permits, everything inside needs to be set. We can’t set things up without desks, which can’t be installed until other details are in place. I could very well panic- I sorta want to panic- but instead I am trusting that all will be done. I really wish I had a few more details about how things will work out… but I don’t, not at this moment. I am OK with it.

Step by step, day by day… there is a theme song that goes this way! Every day we will get a new piece of the puzzle- I know this is my calling and I shall work my hardest to serve my Lord. Even through mountains and mine fields, I shall take each day… step by step.

Edit: Apparently our walk was only 4.6 miles… not 7. Google maps lied to me! Either way, it was a really nice walk- especially at dusk